Vitamin Aficionado Mugs

'Miss Raleigh. I'm studying megatrends. Bring me some megavitamins.'

"I haven't gotten as much done, but I've had a lot more energy ever since I replaced Gloria with a smoothie."

Super and Super Duper Vitamins.

'How is it health food prices always make me feel sick as a parrot?'

Be Healthy

'If only every year was an election year.'

"Winter is coming, and there will be months without much sunshine, so it's important that you take your vitamin D supplement Darling..."

'Let me see your portfolio of stolen ideas.'

'Which sounds better: 'now with MORE XZ100' or 'now with LESS XZ100'?'

'It's perfectly normal for middle-aged men to put on a little weight.'

"Mom, I'm at work – let me call you back after I finish stocking milk for wealthy vegans who like beet juice in their meat alternatives so they can still get that bloody effect when cooking without guilt."

Woman walks her dog on a running machine.

"Where have you been? This content's not going to create itself."

Junk art/ food/ tv/ music/ amusements/ novels/ views/ life.

Treasure Island Book.

'I'll blurb you if you'll blurb me.'

"When was the last time you exercised something other than a purchase option?"

"I can't go much longer without your asking why I'm vegan."

'Fitness guru.'

Fyodor Dostoevsky

"We need to sue, claiming free speech is being violated by remotes with fast forward buttons."

'Just sitting around letting advertisers brainwash me. What about you?'

'It's creative as hell! Now that you've got that out of your system, give me a campaign that will sell.'

They get into debt so fast these days...

"The problem is that our ads have either been too Jewish or not Jewish enough."

"We're looking for the kind of bad taste that will grab - but not appall."

Health Nut with a 60-Pack

"That's 'Help' with an 'H'."

You can't fool all of the people all of the time, especially with our advertising budget.

"So what do you do for a living?"

"And the award for Best Product Placement in a Domestic or Foreign Film goes to..."

'The client loves your work. Cut everything except for their logo.'

John Masefield.

Diet Books: Fiction/Non-Fiction

The Acme Agency: "Dedicated to Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Media Exposure."