
Nervous Oral Testing
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Nervous Oral Testing
I'm looking for employees who have their own unique way of seeing things my way.
"I see by your resume this would be your first time in a symbiotic relationship."
"I always forget what an expert I am in curling."
All Harold's aptitude test showed is that he had an aptitude for taking tests.
'Now, remember...let me do the talking.'
"Wow...your resume is quite impressive."
'I made a hundred on the Spanish test. Gracias.'
"You said mindfulness could help us do well on the test, so I filled it up with as much as I could last night."
Trivia Night in Apartment 8-G
'Your CV says in your last job you were responsible for...'
"How'd I do on the test?"
'Make up your mind, pal - there are plenty of other fish who'd give their gills for this job.'
"Tia Carmen, I have a killer test tomorrow. Can you help?"
"Man, these closed book exams suck! Who could possibly remember all this crap?"
"You question my methodology? Perhaps you should question your questionology."
"Ted doesn't test well."
"You can't see a grief counselor just because you got a 'B'."
"Improve your geography results, Perkins or you're history!"
"In your CV under 'experience' all you've written is 'YIPEE!'."
'You're not at all qualified. Thanks for coming in and wasting my time. We'll let you know by the end of the week.'
Study more to pass more tests.
"I can handle a wide variety of work. In fact I've had ten different jobs in four months."
"Job interview!"
Now Hiring, 'I was about to ask him if he could work without supervision, when he just wandered away!'
'Your resume states that you've worked with 2 presidents, won the Nobel Prize and climbed Mt Everest. That's all fine and dandy, but how are you at telemarketing?'
'Refusing to fill in a psychometric test reveals a lot about you, Jones.'
"Your resume shows you have had numerous jobs and in all of them you were rather invisible."
'Final exams are easier if you think of them as exit polls.'
"I was building up my pecs."
"Dad, when I leave high school, I want to get a job and help support the family."
"Is it ne'er do wells, or ne'ers do well?"
'It's all right, Dad -- it's a Buddhist chat room!'
"The whole thing is basically fiction. But I just thought my resume could use some spice."
'Congratulations, Kevin - Your test scores show that you qualify for our 'frequent homework' program.'
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