Virtual Community Member Gifts

"It was nice for his online friends to turn up!"

No, you idiots, they don't include a "comments" section.

Evolution.

Bird Tweet.

Mr Jones is not seeing anyone in person. Do you have a webcam?

"It would be great if you could turn the smoke machine down a little during worship..."

Human Rights for All

There's a Facebook group for everyone... "Even Toilet Paper Mummies!"

Paranoia vs Social Currency.

"Thanks for coming in."

Computer Life

'And now, concerning the special collection...'

"Sorry, I don't have an opinion - just in case I get vilified on social media. . ."

"So, you're the new guy. My sources tell me you bring a lot to the mat."

On the internet no one knows you're a nerd.

"Long time commenter, first time reader. . ."

Can't Affordiversity

At the modern antenatal class.

Wiccapedia.

"We don't communicate any more..."

'No, I'm not a connoisseur, but I do have a website.'

"...Apparently we're responsible for snow removal on that stretch of highway we adopted."

'My friend Andy is outside with his laptop. He wants to know if I can come out and blog.'

'There's a NAGGING blog?'

Social Networking Explained.

"We had 17 first time viewers on the live stream sermon today." (pastor talking to his wife)

"Yethhh, hello. . .are you clothed?"

Creeping Ivy and Facebook.

"I've joined the world's fastest growing social media website..."

'They play five innings or until six parents fall asleep, whichever comes first.'

'The internet brings everyone closer.'

'My Atheist blog has developed a cult following. If that's not ironic, I don't know what is.'

"Darling your Facebook friends are here!"

'I'm bored being a real boy, Gepetto...I want to be a virtual boy.'

"YouTube have scrapped their dislike button and he doesn't know how to respond."