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'Later, Doctor! Later!'

"Smile when you say that, pardner."

'I'm so happy I could help you with your allergy to snakes, Miss Medusa!'

Though both are long retired, his faithful Indian companion continues to dispense sage advice to an increasingly skeptical masked man.

"Everybody comfortable? Got what they want? Know their place?"

"First of all, I would like to express my gratefulness to all those wonderful ancestors of mine who helped to make this glorious day possible."

Phone. Oh, no! My Clark Kent clothes are gone! Secret Identity Theft.

"I do wish Henry could run into someone from the dress business to talk to."

The camouflage in vietnam was more comfortable

"I saw Mummy Kissing The Mil..."

Oops! Maybe we better make the chicken first.

Gentleman discovering that his servants have been eating most of his good meat

William Tweed - Beyond the Reach of the Law

You're too enamored of wealth, Al. As it says in the Bible, "It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle that for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God." Is that a regular Camel, or does it have a filter tip?

"Now do you believe me?"

"So...What's your excuse for being late today?"

Lost and found - 'Can you desribe it?' (Queen being asked having lost her crown).

"You're a very intelligent little woman my dear."

'Better stick close to the cave today — the big ones are biting.'

"Keep an eye on Old Bound Volume of Harpers. He's on the make."

The Height of Impudence.

Francois Mitterrand

His burro injured, Scotty hauls ass for the nearest town.

Cabman, unhappy with his fare, accuses a lady's husband of not being a gentleman

'A few years ago I switched from the utility belt to utility suspenders.'

"No open toes. I have a puppy."

"I'm a hunter." "I'm a gatherer."

9-1-1. What is your emergency? I've been held captive in a lame comic strip since 1989.

"The problem is, you never know if they're ripe until you bite into one."

"Darn fool! That's not what I meant when I told him to get out there and put on a brave face."

"You have been listening to the world premier of Glukovsky's 'Revolt of the Machine.'

"With wins today, the Monster team and the Ghost team are moving on to the big game in two weeks." The Monsters will need to play better against the Ghosts. Dracula must come out for blood next time. And Frankenstein has to show up with his head on straight. If the fans hate the Ghosts, it might be impossible to beat them. Yeah, they love hearing "Boo!".

Fat footman has been told he will be dismissed if he doeas not lose weight

Mr. Punch cycling

A chemist misunderstanding the request of a lady after a way to clean gloves.