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". . . and I wish he's shut up for a few minutes!"

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"

"Any questions?"

"And finally, I'd like to take any questions from the floor."

"Yes, Jane Lyons, sitting next to Katy Jones, class of 2018, it is important for a writer to know her audience."

'Mutation and natural selection? - That sounds awfully STRESSFUL!'

"Oh yes sir, I'm finding I can get so much more work done, working from home."

'My class is so large and my seat so far back, I feel like I'm taking a distance-learning course.'

Everything You Wanted to Know About Stats ...

Substance Abuse Seminar: How Not To Get Hooked!

"A virus ate my homework."

"The sound system is fixed so we can start. Would you kindly put the beach ball away!"

"I attended a leadership seminar, they learnt a lot from me."

'You think he overheard my last lecture on tax code revision?'

'Success in business door' - keep your finger on the button doorbell.

"Don Wood? I don't know any Don Wood!"

"Is this where the breakout session on adolescent behavior meets?"

"I can't tel you what an honor it is to be the keynote speaker at the Supply Chain management Seminar."

Principles of Anaesthesia.

'I see Phelps is back from that stress reduction seminar.'

'I take it the Change Seminar stripped you down to your vulnerabilities.'

'I don't offer any free advice anymore. I am offering a self-help seminar and a motivational coaching program online.'

'What's the chance of getting a latte around here?'

"I have a question: does intersectionality take into account that frequent power outages in my country may not allow me to sit through this webinar?"

'I sent an employee to a motivational seminar once. He came back and took my job.'

In a career limiting move, Reginald decided to give Albert's latest theory some frank and fearless feedback.

Mentioning 'Sex'

"Maybe there's a free lunch, too?"

"Welcome to Truancy Prevention 101."

'Why can't we just go to school.org?'

"Not many of you may agree with me..."

Today's seminar is going to be so much fun...

The sheep are much easier to keep track of now. They spend all day watching clips on Ewe Tube!

"My lecture is about our short attention spans and what a lovely day it is I should be walking but tomorrow maybe I’ll cut the grass..."