Vegan Foodie Mugs

"And your tofu, would you like food with that?"

"Two vegans, please."

Man in vegan retaurant: 'I'll eat anything with a pulse.'

"Ok everyone. . . say, organic, soy-based tofu, dairy substitute."

"I can tell you're enjoying your alternative-meat burger. Look at the beet juice running down your chin!"

Vegan Menu

"Mom, I'm at work – let me call you back after I finish stocking milk for wealthy vegans who like beet juice in their meat alternatives so they can still get that bloody effect when cooking without guilt."

What's In Her Bag? Coachella Edition!

"At first glance this diet might seem boring but then you realize there are actually seven varieties of kale!"

Vegetarian Birds

"Charles didn't like tofu."

"I can't go much longer without your asking why I'm vegan."

Happy Surrogate Thanksgiving

'VEGETARIAN ZOMBIES' BW

'Rob is a vegan.'

"Dig in. It's a medallion-of-veal look-alike."

"Now make sure your heat is high enough to sear your putrid meat quickly."

'It's the LAST time I volunteer to organise the staff Christmas meal, I've spent three days trying to find a 'traditional' lacto-vegan Christmas menu.'

'Smile and say: tofu-based dairy substitute.'

'Carrot salad, carrot casserole, carrot juice, carrot cake - I want steak!'

Free salad bar.

"Repeat after me... We are vegan... We are vegan..."

Zombie Pulse Eating Vegans.

'VEGETARIAN ZOMBIES' colour

"I'll have a gluten-free, hypoallergenic vegan cookie with whipped hand-sanitizer topping."

'Now you tell me you've gone vegan?'

'It's your lucky day. I just went vegan.'

Try our AMAZING Soups!

'Not only do you get out of cooking tonight, but you found a place with a lazy chef too.'

"It's a no-pepperoni pizza-- a message of hope for all mankind."

"This place has the best vegan nachos!"

'I'm going to try that 'vegan' thing, Joe -- give me some beer nuts.'

"Cool, I've never met a vegan flamingo before."

Free Range / Deranged

"Oh, I see the problem – you brought impassable burgers."