Vanity Voyeur T-Shirts

This is what Fred gets for wishing for more hair.

"Come on, dear, you're only as bald as you feel."

'He's wearing a toupee.'

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

Surfer Blowing Back His Hair.

"I can never get my sunglasses on my head the way my hairdresser does"

"And now. . . which shoes?"

'Be ready in a minute - just have to put on my face.'

'Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who is the fairest algologist of all?'

"Do you have any of that after shave that makes me look like Brad Pitt?"

'Maybe a helium boob job wasn't such a good idea,babe!'

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

I'm getting an ample full taste... I'm getting whimsical... I'm getting 'red'

'I'm having a bad whisker day.'

'I washed the gray right out of my hair, but now I can't get the gray out of my tub.'

"Hair spray"

'Still workin' on the beard, Jerry?'

'You certainly lived a remarkable life. Any chance you'll get over yourself?'

"I had a consultation with a plastic surgeon. Now I have to decide whether I want to look old or look weird."

"How are the new lips feeling babe?"

'You're on Deck! Wilson! Hurry up with that pedicure!'

Man brushing the teeth of his reflection.

TV-Mirror.

'Cosmetic surgery.'

"...And please let at least one person admire my new hat!"

Krest Yellow Strips. (Rat performs dental hygiene.)

Vanity artist

'Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's is the fairest arse of all?'

'I can't see anything through these ridiculous tiny slits, I'll take them.'

'If you ain't broke, I'll fix it.'

"I see he finally got rid of that idiotic comb-over."

'Your new teeth whitener is keeping me up.'

'Get the 'extra hold' bear spray. I want to look good when we come out of hibernation.'

"Maybe if I put these under my pillow I'll get a visit from the hair fairy."

"Would you look at the carrot on that guy!"