Vampire Lore Enthusiast Pillows

Vampires Into Stem Cells.

'This is the third time your grandmother has died this year. Tell me, have you tried putting a stake through her heart and cutting her head off?'

Vampire Hell.

"Why does it matter to you what my blood group is?"

"Ugh! Damn floss..."

Dracula acquires a taste for maple syrup.

"But I put garlic into nearly ALL my cooking..!"

"Dang it! Honey, this whole batch of type B positive has gone sour!"

"To be honest I thought it would be more intimidating..."

Garlic bread.

"Stop! He's my agent!"

Dear Santa, How come you live for ever and are never seen in the daylight?

The Red Cross expands an alternative blood distribution market...

The Penguin Vampire's Awakening

'I am a robot sent from the future to stop you from creating the vampire characters. They're ruining our movies.'

Livid! What? Popular culture is glorifying vampires. Have we forgotten that these creatures kill, feed off human flesh, and most of all, belittle the aging process?! I can get livid even about things that don't actually exist. Your anger is immortal.

I can never remember which goes better with fish, red blood cells or white.

Paul Ryan, Bloodsucker

Transylvanian backpackers.

Vlad the Impala

'Hello? Missing Persons?'

Don't be fooled by the theatrics. She'll only suck your sap!

'... And this is my cellar.'

Dracula in a Vampire Hospital getting some extra blood from a Human blood drip

Vlad the Inhaler

1847 - Bram Stoker, creator of Dracula was born in Dublin.

A vampire sitting on a park bench at night feeding bats.

One vampire tricks another behind a mirror.

A vampire in a canoe.

Doglike man to vampire: 'Call me an apprentice werewolf, or even a beginner werewolf, but don't call me an under werewolf!'

He looks so natural lying there...

'Don't worry, you're safe. I started my diet today.'

Astral Projection

'Well, now we know why Dracula's been getting all the girls lately.'

"Bram Stoker's Bambi"