University Newcomers Mugs

"His first out-of-body experience."

Swinging on a star.

'The child is very illogical'

'I've already been recruited by one of the top fast-food chains in the country!'

Botany Baby!

"We realize that kids start using technology at a younger age these days, so our strollers come with Bluetooth, Wi-Fi and GPS."

"Congratulations. It's a chick."

'Hm-m-m - it sleeps most of the time. I think it must be some kind of cat.'

"This should send the midwife off in a frenzy."

Baby Screen Time

"Congratulations—It's a well dressed boy."

"His name is James Tom Dave Jon Lee Robert Glenn Joseph Tony Sam Barnes. We didn't want to hurt any relatives' feelings by not naming him after them."

Mum and the Sleepless Baby

"And remember, it's important to wake them up at hourly intervals."

'They're just adorable at this age - before they develop a personality.'

Bedtime story.

'Hey, Mom, here comes Frankie's tailor!'

Apricots

"Well, I'm just saying, buying me a cheap used car for graduation is not going to teach me responsibility."

"Should we keep the receipt in case of returns."

"Which one's yours?"

Out of patience

Newborn Chaos

'Who the heck told my wife I had rights to parental leave?'

'What's the fist thing you're going to think of when your brain is fully formed?'

Chilly baby.

"Mom, are you going to properly vet the baby before you bring her home from the hospital?"

Financial Services For Lawyers...Beginner's Class...

"If we're lucky, she'll get a single wear out of this."

"Let's go to sleep so that when we wake up today will be tomorrow."

Caution. Slippery when wet.

L'il Buckaroo on Board.