Two-wheeled Wanderer Pillows

"First aid box, puncture repair kit, mobile phone, energy bars and plenty of liquids; I think that's all eventualities covered..."

'There's a lot of bugs in these parts, so I suggest you wear your helmet from here on out.'

Biker chopper shopper

"I can see clear skies ahead...nearly there...not far now..."

'The upside is that it will guarantee you get laid, the downside is that there's a four year wait.'

Bicycle helmet for two.

The planned obsolescence blues

Cycling Deaths

"I like going to school...and I like coming home from school. It's all the stuff in the middle that gives me trouble."

The Fast Lane.

Food deliverer's baby.

'It's not meant to be a fold up bike, but the truck driver I held up for seven miles thought otherwise.'

Mountain bikes and molehill bikes.

"Can he call you back? He and his mid-life crisis are celebrating their tenth anniversary."

'The problem with migrating is that the roaming charges for my mobile phone are enormous...'

Two wheels good, four wheels bad.

Rail travel - the environmental alternative (that sometimes doesn't allow bikes)

"They can steal my bike, but they can't take my dignity."

Bicycle Sidecar.

Child praying - asks god to bless his family and the new motorbike he's bought with his father's credit card.

'I appreciate the fact that your husband likes my bike, but can you tell him to quit drooling all over it?'

'Your request for a motorcycle as your company car was rejected. However, I'm not totally unreasonable. Enjoy!'

The Feng Shui of the road must be off.

'I normally don't ride a dirt bike, but my motorcycle doesn't do well on potholes.'

Biker and Cyclist.

Boy on a bike

Mad Cyclist Disease, the latest problem to plague cyclists.

"What an amazing view!"

"USA map"

Motorcyclist.

'Instead of teaching me useless tricks like rolling over and fetching, how about teaching me to ride that motorcycle of yours?'

Man on bike

Old Geriatric Hitchhiker holding a sign saying 'Last Fling',

"That settles it, John! We're getting this bike a tune-up!"

'No, Mr. Flanagan,I didn't pull you over to harass you for being a biker...'