Twisties Survivor T-Shirts

"I, too, get the twisties."

"Hey, you stick your neck out on a regular basis, it's gonna happen. The important thing is to just get up and keep moving forward."

Stock market Bull & Bear financial whirlwind.

"Is it just me, right, is it just me ...?"

"Wanna play 'Waitin’ on the Cable Guy'?"

"No, I'm not building a raft. I'm building a double bed!"

'We're in a hurry.'

"Face it, Tim, that cute little Pet Rock you bought in 1976 is now a full-grown boulder - it's time to set him free!"

'Look at the bright side. Think of our mutual funds going up, up, up!'

Gymnast tangled up.

"It's a weak pilot, but, if your stick with it, by Season 3 you grow completely numb to the show's quality and just keep hitting Next Episode."

'No wonder you can't relax! Seven hundred miles in one day!'

'I sure hope you're a marriage counselor.'

"Listen, girl: It's been three days, we're lost and out of food. I need you to find a radio that has the Bruins game on ..."

A marooned man builds a swing set from his lone palm tree.

'What I like about Christmas is that wonderful feeling of freedom when it's all over.'

'It just hasn't been my day.'

'Don't be mad, I'm just following your instructions.'

He's listened to 'Mull of Kintyre' eleven times and he's still holding.

'The tide goes out along way, doesn't it?'

'This day goes from bad to worse.'

'You're trying to hail a taxi?... Are you insane? You'll never get one at this time of day!'

"We've taken out a second mortgage on our first one."

Excess Baggage: Anyone who think business travel is glamorous should have a talk with a business traveler.

Tennis anyone?

"I'd say my number-one issue is getting off the island, and then, after that, probably health care."

'LAND!'

"I'm sorry, but I believe I'm now way out of your network."

'No need for that. I owe taxes, they'll find us!'

All work from home and no play makes Jack a dull boy

Never give up! Unless it's really h.....

Sales Downturn

Desert Island Slob.

Man sees 'Back to the Eighties' poster, says "OMD!"

"Well, back to therapy."