Twisted Tale Lovers Mugs

'...and the axe murderer lived happy ever after...'

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

A small snooker player chalking his cue.

"Sorry kids, wrong house. This one is made of vegetables."

"...and the dung was this big!.... No...elephant, actually."

"I'm sorry, my therapist told me to give up slaying dragons."

"Daddy, can I have a pony killed?"

"The true story"

"Hopefully, the 7-foot guy is on our side."

'Our tuna salad baguettes are this big!'

'I,m trying something new...giraffe manure!'

Statue Selfie

'It was owned by a little ol' lady who didn't drive it. She used a motor scooter on Saturdays.'

Upon returning to school, none of the boys could help but notice how much Allison had developed over summer vacation.

"Ok this is where we're at, pig 1 house of straw approved! Pig 2, house of sticks, approved! Pig 3, house of bricks, um. . . denied."

"Congratulations. You earned time off for bad behavior."

Little Red Riding Hoodie.

T-Rex Basketball

"It's Bo Beep again, she's completely lost it!"

God sees his doppelganger in the toiletries aisle.

'It's not rain!...It's KONG!'

"I was on my way home when there was this sudden puff of smoke!"

"What powerful growth hormones your taking, Grandma"

'I went fly fishing yesterday. I caught a 5lb blue bottle.'

“God, no! It’s ripping me apart!!” “The very very hungry caterpillar”

"Ok I was wrong. It's not a cold, you are a werewolf."

Milton reaches the end of the rainbow and finds a pot of diabetic supplies and gold test strips.

Little Red Riding Hoodie.

Post-Lyme-Tick Fairy Tales

Genetically enhanced height

'I know you've been sleeping with my conjoined twin brother, now where is he hiding?'

Edward the Overtall