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'Since our cable company raised rates for the second time in a year, we're gonna switch to satellite.'

"Can you believe all the homework we have? How do teachers expect us to find time to binge watch our favorite shows?"

Sometimes I wonder who is controlling whom.

John Stride

'Where exactly did you get this 'Lifestyle Guru' from?'

'Can't you decide which programme to fall asleep through?'

'Could you make an exception? He doesn't know how to eat without a tray table and remote control.'

She's been like that ever since we had her spayed.

Big Brother.

'I don't plan on missing anything this stretch. My wife is TiVoing all of my shows.'

"The seven series of West Wing didn't last this long."

"Another CSI spinoff? What's this one called?"

"I am afraid you were misinformed. I am not dead, just bored to death."

"If women are from Venus and men are from Mars then I think he's from a skip outside the Burger Bar."

"This is a man trap and some poor creature is caught in it now."

He's in training for the rugby World Cup.

Bowled over again!

'The following program is intended for beer bellied, sports crazed, couch potatoes!'

"Would you sit and watch a 12 hour movie?"

I have an idea - Let's sit around the campfire and watch scary movies on our iPads!

"I remember when the death of the hero meant the end of the sequels. Now it marks the beginning of the prequels."

"Bloody hell!"

American Idle.

"I'm sorry, we're looking for the voice of a spunky animated turnip and your reading is more fruit than vegetable if you understand what I mean."

TV-Man

Film Festival. Events. Screenings. Ernie attends these festivals in costume. He's gone over to the dork side!

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

"I know! Two years without anymore Game Of Thrones?"

Check your universal remote control at the door.

Star Wars vs Star Trek

"We need to make it through at least one movie, so we have something to root for during the Oscars."

'well, Fred, I see you're finally embracing technology.'

'Me? Dislocated thumb from switching channels to catch all the Olympic events. . .'

'Breaking Bad' Box Set Addiction.

"I'm having a pajama day."