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TV-Man

"For us, binge watching is staying awake for the whole show."

He's in training for the rugby World Cup.

'The following program is intended for beer bellied, sports crazed, couch potatoes!'

Check your universal remote control at the door.

"Doesn't seem like 6 hours on the couch, but you can't argue with a lethargy tracker."

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

Standard endings for sci-fi movies...

'Me? Dislocated thumb from switching channels to catch all the Olympic events. . .'

"I've had a lot of exercise today! I jumped to several conclusions, ran my mouth on the phone, and I just cycled through 500 cable channels!"

Binge Watch

'Just sitting around letting advertisers brainwash me. What about you?'

"Actually, Burt's weathering the stay-at-home thing pretty well."

"Blood pressure 210/140. Heart rate 185. Steps taken 29. Sedentary 9.5 hours. Calories burned 19. You da man! Oh, and you're out of pork rinds." "Our classics TV marathon featuring 'Gunsmoke' will continue after..." "The unfitbit"

"Let's finish off our night of being productive by starting another season."

"Your blood sugar levels are off the chart! Just how many Hallmark Christmas movies did you watch?"

"This is his fifteenth successive Olympics."

Lady throws dart to decide which soap opera she's going to watch.

"I'd hold off on the peking duck another five minutes...the show's almost over."

Birthday To-Do List

'Where exactly did you get this 'Lifestyle Guru' from?'

"I watched a Lassie marathon today and realized that I really need to step up my game."

Inactive wear store.

"Let's see what's going on in the world."

'I would've done my homework, but they kept saying 'stay tuned'.'

"Shouldn't you be studying?

'So, what's it gonna be? Are we gonna watch a good cop show tonight, or a bad cop show?'

'Dad, is this like ... you doing your own thing?'

"It's time to get the couch gutters cleaned again."