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'I preferred it before we had high definition television.'

Academic Jeopardy ... 'What Was the Maiden Name of Dante Alighieri's Maternal Grandmother?'

This is Lenny the leopard with the on-the-spot news.

Royal Mail boss to become ITV boss.

"No, I don’t find it funny that her first words are ‘South Park’!"

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

"Don't worry - I'm here for the television."

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

Television Readers.

Where the Appalachian Trail Crosses the Path of Least Resistance

"Well, the remote's not dowmn the back of the couch."

"The batteries in his TV remote died. The shock of not being able to use it for two minutes has put him in a temporary state of shock."

T. S. Eliot Meets Beavis And Butthead

'I wasted half my life perched on top of a mountain in the Himalayas. Only to discover that the true meaning of life was a night in watching the box, with a few cans of lager.'

Love is when you watch television together.

There's a crew here from 60 minutes and they're coming this way.

"Do you know any other songs besides the theme to The Andy Griffin Show?"

'They're just like us, except they watch more television.'

TV jester.

"Now we move over to the sports desk."

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

The city of San Francisco switches from cable cars to satellite dish at a cost of only $79.99 a month for the first six months.

We saw this episode of Grey's Anatony, I recognize the symptoms.

"No way. Lando, my friend. Lando." "There's no way Lando Calrissian was a better betrayer than Alex Krycek." "Ask any passerby on the street. 9 out of 10 of them won't even know who Alex Krycek is." "That's utter foolishness. Everyone knows Alex Krycek. He was basically the X-Files' anti-Mulder. He could out-weasel Billy D. Williams any day." "Stop!" "When men start arguing over which fictional character was a better betrayer, they have officially run out of things to talk about." "That Kr

"I find that hugely offensive!"

TV-Man

A tourist watches a television on the back of a donkey

'We need you to settle a bet -- was 'Twilight Zone' a sitcom or a documentary?'

'Someday TVs will be in big boxes on the floor.'

"I know! Two years without anymore Game Of Thrones?"

'Enough already. It's a car, not a transporter.'

'Contrary to the popular view, our studies show that it is real life that contributes to violence on television.'

Big screen TV.

'Come quick: Rin Tin Tin is on TV again...'

'Poll results are in...90% of Americans can't spell Schwarzenneger.'