Tuition Review Time T-Shirts

"Dad, the dean has gone over your financial statement, and he doesn't think you're working up to your full potential."

Computer Room.

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

'Our admission policy is now simplicity itself. If you have the tuition, you're in.'

'Salaries Manager. No.'

"Yes, you have given 100% to this company. But, over the five years you've worked here that's only 20% a year."

"I want a top education, but don't milk me dry with school fees."

'We apologise for the delay to the yum-yum train.'

A man and his baby are wearing bibs with images of what they are eating.

"So do I take it that's a 'NO' to the pay rise?"

'I never wanted the best years of your life Clayton - just a few good days would do.'

'Does it matter what answer I put down? After all, this is Liberal Arts.'

"Okay, you got this! Who introduced the theory of punctuated equilibrium?"

'Horace spends his spare time being a rock critic.'

'What would you say to a salary increase?'

'Congratulations! And please give your parents this receipt for $148 thousand.'

'I preferred her in the margarine commercial.'

Office Competitions

"My appraisal says disappointing..." "But with a smiley face!"

'...And here's a graph showing which departments have the most jerks.'

'How could I have missed these? I took a multivitamin.'

'I've reviewed your performance, Henderson - and I think it's time we tossed you a bone.'

"We're having a test on the states today, and I can never remember which one was number fifty."

"Writing that book was a real strain."

'Just one criticism of you review of last night's opening play - you omitted to mention that the theatre burnt down while you were supposed to be there!'

"Graduates, faculty, parents, creditors..."

"Average sales figures, average customer satisfaction, average punctuality. Mediocrity is certainly one of your major strengths, Jenkins."

"That's my performance review!? Two thumbs up?"

'You get paid for what you produce at work not what you produce at home.'

I like you, Rudyard. Unfortunately...

'Here's your report card... I mean, review.'

"Pressing the escape key won't get you out of the boss' doghouse."

"Let's first talk about how you could have done worse."

"I'd like a 150% rise."