Trigonometry Buff Pillows

The Nine Circles of Heaven

"Oh, stop it. You are not at all obtuse." Complimentary angles make the other angles feel good about themselves.

Math Dreams

Zoology Class. Test Today. What did you get for the question about Fuzzy Wuzzy?

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

Before the Internet

Igor hesitated - "You give me that silly old brain, and i'll give you these magic beans!"

'If your calculations are correct, this completely revolutionizes everything we thought we knew about why chalk squeaks on a blackboard!'

'And what part of the formula don't you understand?'

'I think I must be ambidextrous. I can calculate interest with both sides of my brain.'

"He gets easily abstracted."

'I don't know much about history, don't know much biology ... but we'll be OK if there's a round on song lyrics.'

"When I said make it RIGHT, I meant correctly."

'Brilliant, Prof.Brainstorm. Any fool can come up with a new product, you've come up with a new tax break.'

Academic Jeopardy - "The great unknowns and cosmic uncertainties of the universe are reduced by this number daily."

'I'm 3 years old - that's 21 dog years - so start pouring!'

"I'm Albert, your new mathematics teacher, but you can call me Al."

'Believe me dad. I'm on the school math team. If your investments declined 50 then increased 50 you did not break even.'

"The state of graduates literacy levels is shoking and both my colleegs agrree that there maths isn't much better."

Quiz Night...

Switch on brain

"The official measure of an inch is three iPhones stacked on top of each other."

I read on Candorville.com that was rank 29,705th in the world when it comes to attention spans. What? Aren't there only 196 countries? The article didn't just include human countries. It included the various animal kingdoms and the plant republics. Did you know that Americans have an eight-second attention span ... but the goldfish who live in little Lionel Brown's aquarium kingdom at 1492 MLK Way in Candorville have a nine-second attention span? Are you sure you weren't reading a humor column?

'Einstein's theory of negativity'

'Did you know there's a river in Brazil named after Amazon?'

"Well, I can't figure it out either. Do we know anyone that can help us with math homework?"

Police outline artist training academy: the intro 101 class.

"Percy Shattock, Page Three Girls...1979 to 1986."

Pi fight!

University. I never really understood geometry until the instructor brought up pizzas.

"As I mentioned next week in my talk on reversible time..."

By the year 2500, 1 in 10 academics will devote their entire career to divining the meaning of the word 'sussudio'.

How Patrick Moore chooses a hotel..."Hmmm four stars".

Mathematics lesson - Equilateral triangle, isoceles triangle, obtuse triangle, and bermuda triangle.