Tree Carver's Muse Pillows

I love me.

Monkey-artist

'New Age Dog Park' Dogs commune with Nature.

'Mom, Dad... we found out that in a previous life, Sheila was a dog and I was a tree. That's why we decided to marry to continue this promising relationship!'

'We have Vanilla, Chocolate and Strawberry on your choice of Cedar, Oak or Elm cone...'

Psychic to Leylandii tree - 'You will reach great heights.'

'Remember, we're planting a tree, not burying a bone.'

Tree Mobsters. 'I didn't hear anything. Did you hear anything?' 'I didn't hear anything.'

'Can you pass me the saw-dust when you're finished with it Darling?'

"I'm the ghost of woodshop past."

Whittlers Mother

Ozone layer claims another victim.

The Re-Giving Tree

"My mum's favourite recipes are: birch with mayonnaise, oak with tomato sauce, hazel with Dijon mustard, beech with salt and pepper and pine with soy sauce..."

"You had too many characters in your last tweet."

"I wonder if this will count for wood carving badge?"

Camouflage Unit

"So....are we, like, dating now? Or what?"

Pinochio's Computer

'It took me five years to learn, but now I can climb trees! Let's see if that darn cat will laugh at me now...'

'You wouldn't listen to me. You have to buy the biggest tree in the lot!'

'Yes, this is the most direct offsetting of carbon emissions I've seen.'

William and Real Estate

'It's very nice, dear, but it's still not as lovely as a tree.'

Welcome to Kew Gardens

Changing house name.

Unfinished Furniture.

Bob Ross' bitter brother...

Every time I get a postcard from your brother, I regret that I carved him out of driftwood.

"Yes, I did mention that I wanted a big Christmas tree. However, I doubt that will fit in our home."

8th Annual Chainsaw Carving Competition

"That is so adorable. The tree is hugging you back!"

'Hang on, we'd better leave this one alone: It's a protected species...'

'Elm and oak? The streets were named after trees that were here before the developers cut them down.'

"Just what the hell kind of Viking are you"