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Pirates: "To absent Limbs."

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

"I'm not here to slay you. I'm here to talk to you about diversifying your investment portfolio."

"Is this the best investment strategy you could come up with?"

'It's a note...It says I.O.U. one pot of gold.'

Pirate Squirrels Looking for Buried Treasure

The Dubloon Stops Here

"It says: 'The teamwork that got you here is the real treasure.' Aww."

"I think I just solved my cash flow problem."

"Can you believe you left your job and family to search for this key, and it was under here the whole time?"

"You're lucky someone was nice enough to turn it in."

With Thorssen, it's "Pillage and blunder".

"The Capt'n maintains a balanced portfolio should include a number of off-shore accounts."

'Do you think we should tell anyone about this?'

When Tia Carmen says... "I got it for a very good price!" it means...she stopped at a garage sale on the way home.

Treasure Island Book.

That's supposed to say garage sale!

'This is the BEST well we've dug!!'

Hey, I think I found something. Heavy metal detector.

"Yes, it's nice my husband has hoarded a fortune, but it would be nicer if he would let me spend some of it though..."

"Why can't you just dig things up like normal dogs?"

"I love these old decorations!"

I.O.U. one pot of gold.

"According to the map, the treasure should be right behind that door."

"Actually, I used them as collateral for a loan."

"Of course, it may be one of those sting operations!"

Pirate

Man commiting suicide finds the treasure at the bottom of the sea.

"Did you check the little patch of grass by the swing set?"

Unbeknownst to most, dogs are actually greedy bastards searching for gold,

'We always like to give more bling for the buck.'

Archaeologists discover a football

"Arr, we found your luggage, Captain."

'I meant a book report on 'Treasure Island,' not a report on the Muppet movie version.'

"Awwwk! Mutiny is a go! Pass it on! Awwk!"