Travel Satire Lover Pillows

'Will keep it down ... you're disturbing our pilot scheduling policy discussions.' Sleeping Pilots?

Your Luggage

Carefree luggage.

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

Dear Diary. . . why, oh why, did I choose an adventure holiday?

Airport Security.

"If God had meant us to fly, he'd give us more leg room!"

The Euro-Trash Trashcan

'Camping is nature's way of promoting B&Bs.'

"No flight of the Bumblebee"

"Let's see, I make it four suitcases, a rolling bag, and a tote bag... You sure that's enough for our two day trip?"

"This bag is carry-on, and this one is kick-drop-throw-and-pile-on."

'Hang on a second, I think I have a sand castle in my shoe.'

"Didn't you just say that?"

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

"I thought they just hibernated for the winter."

"We're off. We got a loan to fill er up!"

'If the GPS has to tell you, 'No, we're not there yet' one more time...'

Public footpath on a desert island.

"The candy on the pillow is a nicety of the house."

Limerick Airport

'This one is a bit different - twelve Indian call centres in eight days.'

"Rule #1: don't offer to carry anything!"

"Well, we did book the Grill Suite I suppose."

Billy strip: comic will make you sick.

Can I have a look at the map?

Getting out of baggage fees is tricky, another sweater or two and I'd be charged for an extra seat.

'Are we there yet! Are we there yet! Are we there yet!'

'Our trip to Florida was great until Rob took us driving with the dolphins.'

The leaning tower of Pizza.

'Straight on, you can't miss it.'

Biliard Enthusiast

A pocket of pygmies - "Have you anything to declare sir?"

'As a matter-of-fact I didn't pack my own bags...Well,well, well...Speak of the devil!'

'Your luggage went to Bosnia-Herzegovina, sir, and I'm afraid they're holding it for ransom.'