Travel Philosopher Pillows

"Lest we forget, dear Tenzing, it's about the journey and not the destination."

"Does it really matter what we call it? 'The tonic of travel'... 'Migration'... 'Flight to avoid prosecution'... They're all the same thing, right?"

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

Dear Diary. . . why, oh why, did I choose an adventure holiday?

Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda

Future Tents

"It says here that in your last job you did a lot of traveling."

"Remember, it's the journey not the destination."

Have you considered a career in travel brochures?

The Adventures of Tom Friedman, Boy Reporter

"Two roads diverged in a wood, and Rachel took the one less traveled... Huge mistake."

"Seriously, I'm not lost: I'm a travel writer..."

Orville Wright, not sure he wants to eat airline food, brings a sandwich to his historic first flight.

'If you've brought us gifts we don't want any more Des O'Connor records!'

Religion & Economics.

'I'd prefer it if the view was closer.'

Lane restricted to cars with three or more persons at least one of whom is a woman or visible minority.

'You know, if we had a bed and breakfast, we could use it ourselves!'

"Road construction used to bother me. But compared to all the craziness going on in the world, I'll take this any day."

'The tales I could tell, sonny... I've marked my way across 7 continents, from the Kelly green hydrants of Belfast to the salty yellow curbs of old Shanghai...'

'You know how you can never be bothered to read Tim and Sue's postcards?'

"I think I've arrived at the airport too soon"

Last Real Tough-Minded Thinking for 200 Miles

Traffic Lights Medicine

'Existential truckstop'

The Antiquary

'The shrink said my holiday was hereditary - my family.'

'Don't you have any maps of undiscovered secrets of ancient temples?'

The back of the Taj Mahal.

Philosopher's Tours - Honk If You Know the Meaning of Life.

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single travel requisition."

"Emotionally, I'm checking three bags."

"I would have been driven out of my mind if the lanes hadn't been closed."

"You want to pick up your orders yourself?..."

Luggage checks.