Training Trailblazer T-Shirts

'Before we begin I need to inform you that the computers in this row are not working and some of the passwords are not being accepted by all the computers.'

Man painting over a 'You are here' sign.

'It's not easy being ahead of your time.'

"Because, dang it, even cowgirls deserve a little 'me' time."

"My salary app pings when another new male exec at my level is making more than 77% of what I make."

Hither and Yon sign

"Frank and Sheila finally get off the beaten path."

"Oh, honey, look! Just under that candy bar wrapper, next to the empty Bud Light can and to the left of the plastic bag... a salamander!"

"Trail mix?"

"Don't even think about it."

'Don't worry about getting lost, folks. These trails are all well marked. . . if I do say so myself.'

"I'll get my 10,000 steps in tonight!"

Mountain bikes and molehill bikes.

Ski Slope Rated Black Due To Wall At The Bottom

"One day, I'll be the first woman!"

Woman forcing family to hike through hills.

"I love the things I say when I’m in nature."

Women in a cross country race

"So, how's the money pit in the kitchen coming?"

Wherever the Trail Leads. . .

We need to see him because there's no satellite-based system to guide us on a trip down the path to enlightenment.

"Take a right at Rocky's fire hydrant. A left at Duke's bench and the dog part will be one block past buddy's tree."

'No, this is not Mel's secretary. This is Mel.'

'Y'know, this wouldn't keep happening if you learned to load your pack properly.'

"What happened to the good old Jewish holidays when all we used to do was eat?"

Bear Signpost.

"Hungry? I'm ravenous, Norman, I could murder a lentil cutlet."

"Stop whimpering. Most dogs would kill for a walk like this."

"Just to be clear, this is a hike, not a ‘walk.’"

Glass Ceiling

National Park Map

"Just one question...how on earth do I get down?!"

Man with twisted legs using a twisted walking stick.

"You can take her ... just pretend she's my mother."

"Your bone."