Training And Development Manager Pillows

"The Sales Department suggests we teach Customer Service personnel how to assist customers without telling them where to go."

Rocket Launch Control Centre Back in 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1

The Department of Blind-Side Bias, Knowledge Gaps and Really Great Coffee.

"I've just been offered a job sorting out the Y1K bug.."

"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"

'Hey, look, I can stand up and shout, too!'

'Believe me, I know transformation isn't easy. I pulled a muscle once.'

"Remember Mr. Cockbundle is not just a 'customer', he is an important source of valuable and readily marketable data."

Robot Jogger

Pushy Dog

Research and Development: Now, Never.

"Your job is to build an app that replaces you."

'I reckon we need a new sweeper.'

'We went generic. The players' salaries are affordable.'

"Fellas, I invited Max here to give us a fresh, millennial take on how to get out of the inning."

'This is gonna be one of those teamwork talks, isn't it?'

Project Manager Showdown

Great training inspires employees: 'I see myself doing you job before too long...'

"Either accept the pay reduction or you get sent down to the minors."

STRIP *Community Care * Squeezing it all in before lunch

"'CPD'...stuff and nonsense, the old ways are fine for me, now pass me a hammer. I need to put this patient out!"

"We'll start with some 'ice breakers' and 'team building' games..."

Keys to Success: Focus, Alertness, Concentration...

'Focus! Focus! You've just gotta' forget about their home ground advantage.

Great coaching is about building constructive relationships...

"We won again, and guess what? A Russian oligarch wants to buy us!"

"We hope it's just a bug with our new Quantum mainframe."

'We believe in having a very specialised team. Watkins here for example provides all our human error.'

The three Musketeers give a PowerPoint.

Tech Corp: Personnel Openings - We've reached our quota of nerds, but we are looking to hire geeks.

'We like the teamwork idea, but Mr. Superstar won't let us play with his ball.'

'In the modern world manufacturing takes place in China. Most R&D is one in South Korea and support and logistics is based in India.'

"We're a happy team here Benson - let's try to keep it that way."

Dog wearing gas mask brings slippers to his owner.

"Oh sure, we cut labor costs by replacing humans with machines but now there's nobody to suck up to me!"