Trainee Chef Mugs

"Remember, never put all your eggs into one omelet."

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

'As a surprise I thought I'd give the new cookbook a try tonight.'

'Another neat trick is to cut regular spaghetti into little pieces, and next thing you know you've got yourself a bowl of spaghetti-i-s.'

Turkey Autopsy

"I hope you don't mind - I'm training a brand-new assistant and I've asked her to check your blood pressure."

"Still haven't quite figured out the pressure cooker, huh dad?"

"....And then chuck the whole lot in the dustbin and phone for a take-away."

"Keep in mind, this dish is best served in a restaurant cooked by anyone other than you."

'Hold on, Pepe!... The score is tied with less than a minute to go - and the losing team gets boiled.'

"Dad fixed you a balanced breakfast - the runny eggs are balanced with burnt toast!"

Will work for Food Network.

'We're at an Italian restaurant this time, Kevin -- those are breadsticks, not giant-size chopsticks.'

Boys Cooking

"On. More. Try."

Boy baking a cake.

'You can't have a drumstick because this is roast beef.'

'Step 5. Call the Fire Department.'

French bread

Instead of a cap and gown Mike got a hairnet and spatula.

'This soufle is hard.' - 'No it isn't, your teeth are soft.'

"I want you to be well in life, son...."

'Mom, I followed your time-honored legendary family recipe for Brussels Spout Bake with one exception - I substituted a pizza for the Brussels Sprouts.'

'Mom, am I store-bought or homemade?'

'LOOK RENOLDSON, i've had JUST about enough of your moaning and groaning! IF you can't stand the heat, GET out of the oven!' / A chef scolding his apprentice inside an oven.

'Too much salt!'

Manager reading The Little Trainee That Could: 'I think I can, I think I can...'

'I could beat these eggs a lot easier if it weren't for all the shells.'

'Just call me Delia...'

"Trust me, boss, he knows his pies...he just needs more retraining."

"I'm making Thanksgiving dinner this year. Do you have Turkey Helper?"