Traffic Planner Prints

Caution Confusing Signage Ahead.

Do Not Enter and No U Turns

Pied Piper walking down the middle of the road: 'It's the latest idea to control the rat run.'

Ahh Spring...

Traffic delays into Saturn.

Traffic Jam.

'Stand and deliver, you car-driving bastard!'

Road widening scheme - 'More lanes? No we are just preparing for fatter drivers.'

Man driving on the wrong side of the road looks at road markings and asks his wife: 'Honey, where does the M075 take us?'

Traffic jam.

'Midtown scrap'

Magic Carpet and the Self Driving Lane

Thru versus Through Traffic

Steep Hill, Slippery When Wet, Watch for Cars Going Faster Than You.

'Why don't you just pull over and let them pass already?!?'

Quality Control

'This country is on the road to ruin.' - 'Well, it'll never get there in this traffic.'

The inhabitants of the jungle get tied up in rush hour traffic.

Unpopular Street Signs: Road Work Behind, Speed Jump Ahead, Good Luck, Slow Distracted Adults.

New Road Signs to Watch For:

Dog Crossing

'Wow, these lights stay on the red cycle for a very long time.'

Three lanes of traffic with the first two lanes crowded with turtles. The third lane (to the left) a couple rabbits speeding along without any traffic. An easy pass sign has carrots replacing dollars.

'I think we took a wrong turn between the seventh and eight holes.'

'It's not meant to be a fold up bike, but the truck driver I held up for seven miles thought otherwise.'

Walk or don't. You're a grown man. Make your own decisions.

'Someone's got to do something about these pot-holes!'

"When the slowest car in the fast lane don't go any slower than the fastest car in the slow lane."

Through Traffic Keep Left/We're Through Traffic Keep Right

Monday: Next 7 exits.

Street signs you don't want to see.

'I beat the 5 o'clock rush... I leave work at noon!'

Reserved space is reserved for a dinner table.

"Why is it every time I need to go somewhere, the driverless car is taking itself for a spin?"

"I'm pretty sure my self-driving car is moonlighting for Uber behind my back."