Traditionalist Food Enthusiast Pillows

'Once we escape poverty we won't have to eat any more of this single-batch artisanal wild-produce crap.'

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

Night of the Latkes

"I chose to stand up to special interest groups!"

The Coffee Shop Vats of New Jersey

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

"Tia Carmen's not happy unless she can send people away with a plate of leftovers for the road."

Party time.

Grandma's caf

'Is this still America?'

Full English Breakfast.

"What time did you say you wanted me to start drinking?"

"We've misjudged the tapas again."

You're the sizzle in my roast!

"I'll be glad when the television is fixed."

"Your meal sounded nice."

'I decided to start buying food in bulk. I hope you're hungry!'

"This crew gets 15 miles to the pound of gruel. They're very fuel efficient."

'Fred is a social conservative -- he believes in slow food and heavy beer.'

Dad's old fashioned barbeque

Thermidor Dali

"The special is… pine nut encrusted… filet of salmon… in a balsamic wine reduction."

'Are you sure these sprouts aren't GM?.'

'Pumpkin pie isn't dessert. It's another vegetable.'

'Fred is a social conservative -- he believes in slow food and heavy beer.'

"And this is my oldest son I was telling you about. The one that eats like a horse."

Snacks for Learners

"He'd like the broiled monkfish, too, but first he's having a quick taste of the gutter."

As soon as he began speaking Manuel's Spanish accent was unmistakeable and he was evicted from the Local food group.

"I bought you a cook book. Think of it as technical support."

'Oh, sure, it gets the creative juices going, but is it worth the cost?'

'I told you I only cook with my mother's Italian spices. She just left Naples and should be here with them in about eight hours.'

Empty landscape containing food and stationery.

'He refuses to overeat and get plump. Do you think he knows something we don't?'