Traditional Values Admirer Gifts

'Fred is a social conservative -- he believes in slow food and heavy beer.'

"An early spring was just a prediction- I can't actually control the weather!"

Scot to a Greek: 'Love your outfit.'

Man Reading Laptop.

"Take the off this minute, young lady."

'You must be awfully secure in your masculinity.'

Hooray for Bollywood!

"I often consult with a higher authority... my grandmother."

Folk Wedding

"Tia Carmen, I have a killer test tomorrow. Can you help?"

"Does dad know you're dating the guy from the Seder plate?"

Shall I be mother?

'This is cow country, pal, and we're not real big on innovation.'

Maypole

'How about June? -- I've always had June weddings!'

It's a tradition. On hole number 1 in the first round of the season, Ernie always says that's the best shot I've hit this year!

"Oh, it's a grand day for Harvard!"

"Milton Woolburg, founder of traditions, legends, and general flimlam."

Man wearing a kilt carrying roses.

Your proposal is bold and innovative but we are a traditional corporation. I would prefer changes like the ones we've tried before

Time for Tea

We're waiting to see if he'll see his shadow.

Poorly planned Chanukah crafts

"If we're doing such a good job of keeping the devil away, how come we have so many of these infernal machines around here?"

Queen reigning.

First Marriage.

'I want a traditional church wedding but Sam prefers something trendy. Can we compromise and do it bunji-jumping from the steeple?'

'Not ANOTHER pub boarded up!'

Happy Hogmanay!

'Well,what do you think of the new gown and wig?'

'Why can't you do a yodel that sounds like you're making money instead of cheese?'

"We don't make toys any more. I send the elves to buy them in China."

"We had this last year."

"Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, which may involve an occasional hot=dog-eating contest."

'I totally forgot what I was looking for.'