Tough As Bark Mugs

"Don't mess with that guy. He's a real hardwood."

'I know he doesn't like this house, but he'll just have to get used to it.'

'Or we could just ask her what kind of dog it is.'

'We can't go on meeting like this'.

No Soliciting

"Have you tried biting him?"

"Let's break the record for non-stop deranged barking."

Dog Obedience School: 'I think we're going to have our work cut out with this one.'

"Another slander suit!"

'Don't make such a fuss woman, he's only a puppy!'

Dogs Must Be On A Leash.

Doggie door in The Pearly Gates.

'I had no idea there were so many types of dog treats.'

Should I bark? Flow chart for dogs

"Can you teach me to really bark? I only seem to be able to yap..."

"It's always so loud during yappy hour."

A day in the life of a dog.

'Its a dogwood tree. I can tell by its bark.'

'Actually, mine is a useless hunter, but we both love wandering idly in the woods...'

'He's a very superior dog. Even his fleas have pedigrees!'

"Hello? I`d like to report a missing person..."

"I think he's lost."

The four freedoms: freedom to bark, freedom from fetching, freedom to sleep on any piece of furniture, freedom from leashes.

Noise machines for dogs.

"How can you just sit there, wrapped in your own safe little world, when you know there are millions of squirrels out there?"

"Tales of the Bungee Leash"

"It was humiliating! First, he told me to beg and then he wanted me to roll over and pretend I was dead...so, I bit him!"

Desperate to save his 'Dognity', Rex needed proof that a bark control collar wasn't the way forward for a woof here. . . and a bark there!!'

'You know it's time to bath the dog when he starts to smell like a gym bag!'

'I've pinpointed our problem. There's too much month left at the end of my salary!'

Heel! Toe!

"I bark, therefore I am."

-'I'd like a doggy bag.' -'And make it a big one.'

You shut up! No! You shut up! No! You shut up! No!