Toothpaste Whisperer Pillows

'I'm the toothpaste genie offering you a free dental plan!'

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

Nothing beats the love of a good cat.

Cat Heaven vs Mouse Hell.

Woman setting out a dinner party with name cards labeled cat person, dog person.

Housewife feeding her washing machine with a brief.

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

'You said the computer was coming between us. So I put your name as my password.'

'Honestly, now that Tiger is neutered I'm perfectly happy just cuddling.'

"I'm not his best friend. But he is in my extended network."

Cat Zoom Meeting

"I think I blew the promotion when I started doing some personal hygiene grooming during the interview."

"Sure, it's been a tough quarter, but somehow we always land on our feet."

"People who don't believe in soulmates just haven't met the right animal."

I'm getting an ample full taste... I'm getting whimsical... I'm getting 'red'

'Oh that just means he wants you to rub his tummy.'

"Behold the secret to happiness."

"I think it's unfair to call her a "crazy cat-lady": She just loves all 63 of us..."

"Can you spare a few megabytes of your precious time?"

'You wouldn't believe the day I've had.'

Wino Appreciation Group

"I think we could work very well together."

"And if your teeth could hear you, Larry, what would you say to them?"

Cat Lover's Leap.

'That's my husband, Brad. He's a dentist.'

The Complete Cycle.

"The toaster is sueing the sandwich maker over custody of the bread..."

'I need a new toy!'

"It's an agreeable little wine."

"Have you made any retirement plans?"

"Pick me! No me! Me! Pick me! Pick ME!"

Looks like this is the only contest Fluffy has a chance of winning today!

Puppy and Kitten.