Tomato Humorist T-Shirts

'Don't feel bad if you faint, it's quite normal when there's a lot of ketchup.'

"It's how he would have wanted to go."

'You have a strawberry on your nose, I'll give you some cream to put on it!'

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."

'Flight simulator'

'Waiter, there's a hairball in my soup, too.'

Conference Pears

"But some of my best ideas come while I'm in the litter box."

'You've had enough!'

"Of course I've been drinking!"

"What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot!"

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: The Pied Piper

"What SPF sunscreen do you suggest for lying around in a sunny spot?"

"The vegetables have gone bad!"

"Summer's here. Do you want to start talking incessantly about tomatoes or corn?"

That fateful day when curiosity actually DID kill the cat.

'Be sure to ask George about his tomatoes.'

"He says he can quit anytime, but I'm starting to worry."

The Curiosity Mars rover is seen killing a cat: 'Mission accomplished.'

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Dead Cat Balloon

'Now that we can walk upright, we have to be especially careful about banana peels.'

'This is my wife Hilda, who is quite a tomato herself!'

Broccoli reading: 'Coping with Anthropomorphism'.

"I'm going to a concert by a really famous superstar....he deserves to be pelted with expensive organic tomatoes!"

101 uses of a dead cat: peg leg

'... And I now insert the brai ... Egor, this is a cauliflower.'

'For a little extra we can allocate you a seat inside the aircraft.'

'Looks like another typical caffeine overdose.'

"Well, team....time to trade our 'You Got This!' coffee mugs to the 'Mistakes Were Made' mugs."

Two men stand back to back as the sun rises; one man holds a basket labeled "Tomato" while the other holds a basket labeled "To-mah-to".

101 uses of a dead cat: bagpipe

I tried thinking outside the box once. That was a big mistake!

Mrs. Fergensun unfortunately was crushed before getting what would surely have been a prize winning tomato to the county fair.

Banana Ballet