Time-travel Tourist Pillows

'Do you have anywhere abroad, but like England in 1957.'

'Hi, folks! -- I'm selling vacation time-shares in Atlantis.'

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

"Let's just say I have a pre-existing condition."

"Meet the scribe"

Historical memory is on life support.

'That's about it so far, Son.'

"So then, after I'd invented my time machine, I thought: why not go back and visit the good old days?"

"We're following Carrot Top."

Second hand furniture.

Pinocchio's Second Realization

'Whoops! I think you've arrived a little too early for school today, Dad!'

"About how if the dark ages never happened we'd be so much more technologically advanced by now."

"Damn. I took the Rip Van Nyquil."

Time for vacation, time for work.

'I'd say it's six of one and one half doxen of the other.'

Sundial Time

"Wait... what was it I came up here for?"

"Early model of baggage claim"

"Milk, butter, bread - all past the expiration date. either he just hadn't noticed before, or his time machine worked."

"Please! No harmonizing during ululations!"

'You know what they say - 'Those who don't learn the lessons of history are doomed to go to summer school.''

Danger Slow Sand.

"I'm going to prove that Math comes in handy later in life."

'This new game isn't working out -- the ball keeps running away.'

'When I met him he was all bright and shiny - now he's a rust bucket.'

'I used to spring forward. Now all I can do is fall back.'

"It seems like only yesterday that Dad told me I'll be an adult before I know it."

"I don't know who you are!"

"More quarters! For God's sake, more quarters!!"

"This just in... the country has adopted a 24 hr military clock... ...details at 23."