Time Management Jokers T-Shirts

'Tortoise fanciers dinner 6:30pm for 10pm'

"Why are we late everywhere we go?"

"Day 4,261... I don’t know how much longer I can survive. Still no signs of civilization. Food is scarce and I fear the wound on my ankle is infected. Still, all this pales in comparison to the horror of having to be anywhere at any particular time."

Two plans - one long-term and one short-term.

The Graveyard of Past Deadlines

"You always arrive late at the office." "But I make up for it by leaving early."

'Never put off till tomorrow something you can put off till the day after tomorrow...'

"Wanna play 'Waitin’ on the Cable Guy'?"

Today isn't a good day. He's talking to New York now, then he's got a board meeting, after that there's an old Betty Grable film on TV.

Cost Time A = Edit your strategy Bored Tired

"I'm listing my deadlines by due date so I can miss them in chronological order."

'Enough is enough, John! You've got to choose. It's either your job or me.'

'I said that I didn't want to be interrupted...'

Big Ben

"Yes, but you're a half hour late in dog minutes."

'They're halfway through the six-meter dash. At this pace, the winner should break the world record by at least 24 hours!'

"Almost Ready"

If you are here, you'll be late for the meeting

"Man...and...wife...GO!!!"

'...but I'm already working as slow as I can.'

'Tell the boss I'm leaving an hour early this afternoon, to make up for being an hour late this morning.'

Train Arrivals

'I'm afraid we had to cancel the 'perfect planning' seminar, but the time we got around to booking the hotel was full and the speaker hoped to use died in 1967...'

'When you say I have 24 hours to get out of town, does that include the grace period?'

Man sat on egg-timer toilet

Humpty Dumpty using Egg timer as an Alarm clock.

'I'm beginning to enjoy these long walks with you every day.'

"Deborah, cancel my 3 o'clock."

"I'll tell you my secret for increasing productivity. That clock has been unplugged for half an hour."

"Late, as usual."

"I'm in the middle of something. Can I call you right back?"

'Wake up, it's twenty to six.'

"What took you so long?"

'We seem to have finished our business early so I may as well spend the rest of the meeting telling you about my holiday and the extension we're building.'

Time