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Extreme Accounting!

'Time to buy.'

"With this company, it's like 'Adventure Capital."

'Foster's here, regarding his raise sir. Shall I have him crawl in now, or let him sweat a while?'

Money pouring in for a 'Acme Doodad Company's IPO.

And this is a little ditty I wrote called 'the third quarters profit and loss account' ...Colin often wished that he'd followed his first love and taken up a career as a musician

'If you don't learn how to sign your name, you'll have to pay cash!'

"Some idiot spread the rumour that the boss had called in sick! Now look what's happened to the tobacco and coffee stocks!"

Snowflake Investments...penny stocks, junk bonds: 'Here today, gone tomorrow!'

"My name's Edwin, and I'm addicted to risk."

"Dow's up!"

Yomp Investments - Big risks sometimes means BIG BUCKS!: 'I'm a little uneasy about the 'sometimes'...'

'A few days away from those sharks on Wall Street will make all the difference.'

"Our stock is down. Start some rumors on Wall Street that it's going up."

'I find if I'm the first one in and the first one out, Ponzi schemes can be very lucrative.'

Bull Riding on the Stock Market

'This is Adventure Capital! You want Venture Capital two doors down.'

'And now, here's our own Ted Slimbuck to explain all those ups and downs in the stock market.'

'He's chasing the market.'

'We ride the storm until greed is back.'

Economic

Grexit

'Don't jump! The latest market sector bubble to burst is making a turnaround!'

'Don't jump Pumroy! Just remember: today's frantic selling can quickly become tomorrow's frantic buying.'

'The hair-raising twists and turns, the mystery, numbing assault on the mind...THAT'S why I love tax law!'

"My favorite time of year is earnings season."

Profit Cowboy

'Aren't corporate raiders getting increasingly aggressive?'

'Before you get into the market, Mr. Root, we need to test your pain threshold!'

Rhinestone Accountant

'Trading stocks from home just wasn't cutting it for me anymore.'

"We try to inject a little humor in our statements, but you should take them seriously."

"I had the financial world by the tail. Then it got diarrhea."