Therapy Explorers Gifts

'You've come a long way with your anger this year. In fact, I feel that you are ready to meet a special friend of mine.'

'I don't know, doc. I'm okay. It's just that I don't feel as happy as a clam.'

'It's for teenage girls.'

"Often, I'm not comfortable with the pack mentality..."

"I was almost too chicken to come here."

"That's the one thing we flies cannot abide... closure."

Self help acupuncture

"I scream! You scream! I can't stop the screaming!"

'You were right Doc: Jumping over the monn did boost my self esteem!'

"I don’t know how many ways I can explain it. One morning you’ll just wake up and know that you’re in love."

Emoticon Encouragement Therapy

". . . but he's almost four and he hasn't been labelled yet!"

"All I take anymore is mushrooms for my anxiety, ketamine for my depression, and ibuprofen for the goblins constantly eating my feet."

Mood Swings.

Psychiatry. I got in touch with my inner child, and now I'm going broke buying video games!

'I feel like such a failure: They have to process my milk to make it low-fat...'

Man in a tortoise shell visiting a psychiatrist.

"...but this is the stuff of dreams Mr Whitley! Dreams."

'Look at the bright side -- having a business fail when you're thirty is great preparation for your Midlife Crisis.'

"How much is this going to cost me?"

'A mother complex! Are you sure?'

"He quit online counseling. This gives him the same sympathy, but cheaper."

"Apparently you're a bi-polar bear."

"You have to remember you're not responsible for other people's happiness."

"I know it seems cruel, but it's the only way for him to get rid of that silly technophobia."

We at pharmacorp are 100% behind the benefits of spiritual and artistic therapies which is why we've developed 'megazymol' to enhance the experience!

"Would you describe the pain everyone else causes you as dull and throbbing or sharp like a knife?"

'I'm going to refer you to Dr. Keinsorge -- he actually enjoys this sort of thing.'

Tell me about the voices in your head, Al. On the one hand, they tell me to do horrible things. On the other hand, they sing the sweetest harmonies since the Mills Brothers.

"Too much caution can take all the fun out of life." "Mind if I get a second opinion?"

"There's only so much bat-mansplaining a girl can take."

"Apparently, I'm fun, but I'm no fun in bed."

'Yes, yes, yes, now seriously, what can we do to improve our health?'

It's always the same dream. I'm in therapy, analyzing my recurring dream.

Flo figured that since she was using medical marijuana during chemo, she might as well go hippy retro.