Theorem Lover Pillows

"He ran some linear equations, threw in a few theorems, and before I knew it I was buying rust proofing."

"Oh, come on. That's your answer to everything!"

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

"E=MC² Energy=Milk·Coffee²"

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

'Einstein, the children are getting too complex for me.'

'Never mind inspiration. I need background material on atomic physics.'

Thinking Gears

'How can we believe anything when we can disprove everything?'

'Here's MY information highway!'

'Uhhh... Houston, we have a problem.'

"Your son is asking a lot of questions about the giant hands in the sky that controls everything."

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

A Major Refresher Course is in Order.

"If x is the set of all men that love you, then I am a member of x."

When Engineers Crack.

'Have you no common scents?!'

"Space is curved and time is relative? Yeah, OK...I'm calling you a cab right now, buddy."

'Single math professor in search of an intelligent woman. Send an example of your favorite equation.'

"This just in: one of us always tells lies; the other always tells the truth. Who's who? Stay tuned."

Think Tank

'I have to agree -- the value of pie goes on indefinitely.'

Graduation Speech.

'Upgrades? Yes, we've programmed it to excrete a few drops of water if it should lose a chess match. You know - tears.'

"When you say you're behind me 100%, do you mean base ten or binary?"

'Yeah, I don't have trouble remembering my times tables, but I stink at algebra...'

'What's most depressing is the realization that everything we believe will be disproved in a few years.'

"Well, I'm studying mathematics and I'm sure that's tougher than math."

“Today we are going to be learning percentages.”

Staff Yearbook

How to get from A to Z. Right brain versus left brain.

Illogic Tree

Skeptic: Critical Thinking, Facts, Debunking.

'Stevens, get in here. I need a few minutes with the left side of your brain.'

"Yo, this should be a two."