Theologian Jester T-Shirts

'It's too LATE to show remorse!'

"And as soon as he's on the mend,we'll get the physiotherapist in here with a ball of twine."

"We're following Carrot Top."

'I ace 'wheeling' but I flunked 'dealing'' - Boy on leaving Business Administration.

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

"Philosophy Department. Why may I direct your call?"

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

Stepping on clown's shoe...

A baby in court

'Make him laugh, make him cry.'

"At first, I was teaching Job a lesson, but now I'm just messing with him."

Jesus plays peek-a-boo with doubting Thomas.

'Your Honor, we've decided to go with the inanity defense...'

Garden of Eden and scrumping

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

"I'm popping out for a tinkle."

"Honestly, I have no idea what a 'habeas corpus' is."

"Are you trying to show contempt for this court."

'No, no. I told you to look for a precedent.'

"In mitigation, Sunny Chemicals would like to point out that prior to contracting his skin allergy, Mr Crumb was already ugly."

Travelling jesters. No fools left aboard overnight.

"...And now show us what you said."

'I'm looking for someone who can make me laugh.'

'Make sport of the Queen.'

Disorder in the Court!

"I don't plead."

"These days, I'm mostly just legislating from the couch."

'Ringing in your ears, you say?'

'I'm afraid that driving the getaway car is more than just a driving offence, Mr. Jones.'