Lawyer Jester T-Shirts

"Calm down! This wood doll is the best attorney ourcompany ever had."

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

"We're following Carrot Top."

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

'How about a game of cards?'

"Hire a cost cutting, bad-guy consultant to turn me into a good guy during the layoffs."

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

The New Fundamentals of Art: 'We'll begin with the most basic figure, the trademark attorney...'

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

"Unless one is a humorist, Haskins. One should avoid attempts at humor."

'Wait!... I don't want to take Brady out right now. He's just getting into rhythm.'

"Not guilty but prepared to settle out of court, your honour."

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

'WELL, that certainly was a frank discussion! Shall we proceed to the inevitable apologies, retractions and clarifications?'

"Objection, your honor, my client's feelings are being hurt."

'This court finds you guilty Mr. Jones. As your punishment, the bailiff here will slug you one.'

"#notguilty."

'Can I sue someone because I didn't win my lawsuit?'

Stepping on clown's shoe...

'Your Honor, in order to avoid being sued, we find the defendant 'Not guilty.''

Yawning barristers in court

A baby in court

"I say we move on to dessert."

Portrait of a Serial Attorney.

'Don't worry boss, it's probably archaic!'

Justice 4 Ron

'Make him laugh, make him cry.'

'I couldn't help noticing that nobody swore YOU in!'

Basketball.