The Office Clown T-Shirts

"You heard right, mom...the boss made me his plant manager!"

"You're invited to our management excursion. Come dresses as a pinata."

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

"If I might be serious for a moment..."

"I believe we've found the weakest link."

Bo're'droom

'Senior management wanted me to raise morale so I made Lionel from accounts 'office jester'!'

Here and There Trays

'Since I'm new here, let's start by clearning the air. You may have noticed that I'm short for a C.E.O. . .'

"No training period, but you can purchase my instructional video on line for $49.95."

"Welcome aboard, Bailey. Don't worry — they don't bite."

"He might not have got the job with Google, but they weren't going to stop Brian skateboarding to the office."

'That last meeting was a complete turn-off.'

'What's that? It's a leaving present for the next person who comes in late.'

"The good news is that we do have a little wiggle room."

"It's made entirely out of rejected resumes."

'Who folded the annual report into a paper airplane?'

'Germaine, what did you do with my desk?'

"Honey! Where are my lucky Incredible Hulk board meeting socks?!?"

"Quick, Lassie, go get I.T.!"

It would be a painful forty five minutes before Arthur finally admitted he left his presentation at home.

'Will you kindly remind the rest of the staff that I'm the managing director - not the Godfather!'

'So what do you think of my report, sir?'

'That large, rolled up newspaper is a reminder - mess up in this office and you'll pay the price.'

'Did you just show your teeth at me Wilson?'

How are you at decision making?

Shake it all about sign on desk

"Wilson, I built this company from scratch!"

'Everyone in the company wears one, Yomp! It's what keeps us focused!'

'I hope you replace your divots.'

"Everybody gets a raise."

Crane operator Jimmy Morrison liked to break in new guys by giving them what he called a 'sky wedgie.'

'Here comes the boss. Quick, look busy!'