Textspeak Enthusiast T-Shirts

'Laugh out loud, best friends forever, be right back, in my experience, never again volunteer yourself...'

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

"Ironically, this is the living room."

"Staff support"

Polly txt speak

"My dad says we eat honey 'cause it has lots of vitamin Bee."

Guy at drink stand says to Medium: 'Medium?'

"It's OK, I'm preordained."

Boneheads! I never said I was bringing ten condiments!

Help! I'm ROFL and ICGU!

TAP TAP TAP TAP

"Would you relax? All you guys are so tense. I just wanted to tell you to your face how enigmatic I find you."

Please Drove Carefully.

'So tell me why you think you're suffering from seasonal ineffective disorder.'

"‘Extra vile old ox’? No, sir – it stands for ‘extra virgin olive oil.’"

Punt Cake

'What amazes me most is that years ago I couldn't even spell teacher - now I are one!'

What nationality were your parents? North or south Poles?

Smith Academy. A Tradition of Excellense.

"Out damn Spot

'Hello, Acme signs? This is the Berger & Coles Law Office...'

"When you say the meek will inherit the earth, does that include the mineral rights?"

"He's sworn never to say Boudicca, ShrOwsbury, whoM, or narrative."

Famous Jewish Blues Singer Series.

Wishing Well, Wishing Good.

"Textin’"

"Nuts to you, too."

"Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama?" "That's right." "What's right?" "Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama." "Why are you asking me?"

"Petting zoo" "Heavy petting zoo"

AA Meeting Here Today

"A whack, whack here. A whack, whack there. Here a whack, there a whack. Everywhere a whack, whack."

"Privates Beach"

'It's the report from the consultant. He says we should turn over the turnovers to improve turnover.'

It's a radical new development, a text novel for the text generation