Television Marathoner Pillows

'I haven't seen such irritation since I forced my husband to watch the Suze Orman marathon.'

Our hero rounds the bases to the bathroom, refrigerator, cupboard and slides safely into home!

'Me? Dislocated thumb from switching channels to catch all the Olympic events. . .'

"I've had a lot of exercise today! I jumped to several conclusions, ran my mouth on the phone, and I just cycled through 500 cable channels!"

He's in training for the rugby World Cup.

Bowled over again!

'The following program is intended for beer bellied, sports crazed, couch potatoes!'

"Would you sit and watch a 12 hour movie?"

American Idle.

"I know! Two years without anymore Game Of Thrones?"

Check your universal remote control at the door.

Star Wars vs Star Trek

TV-Man

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

"Doesn't seem like 6 hours on the couch, but you can't argue with a lethargy tracker."

'Breaking Bad' Box Set Addiction.

"Tragic case of having the fridge from the TV when the World Cup is showing."

'Just sitting around letting advertisers brainwash me. What about you?'

"Actually, Burt's weathering the stay-at-home thing pretty well."

Binge Watch

"Your blood sugar levels are off the chart! Just how many Hallmark Christmas movies did you watch?"

"Blood pressure 210/140. Heart rate 185. Steps taken 29. Sedentary 9.5 hours. Calories burned 19. You da man! Oh, and you're out of pork rinds." "Our classics TV marathon featuring 'Gunsmoke' will continue after..." "The unfitbit"

"Let's finish off our night of being productive by starting another season."

Succession 2

Lady throws dart to decide which soap opera she's going to watch.

Starvation Watching

"I'd hold off on the peking duck another five minutes...the show's almost over."

"Today let's work on changing channels, drinking with a mouthful of food, and yelling at the TV all at the same time."

"This is his fifteenth successive Olympics."

"Celebrating Labor Day assumes you've labored at least one day during the previous year."

Birthday To-Do List

"Another CSI spinoff? What's this one called?"

Inactive wear store.

John Stride

"There's nothing on worth watching and we've been watching for three hours."