Telephone Tamer T-Shirts

'I don't take telemarketing calls during dinner time. Can I call you back during your dinner time?'

"I'm sorry, Mother, we don't respond to telephone solicitations."

Busy office.

'I don't want him experiencing anything until I've totally checked it out.'

Catching Jeffrey To Change His Diaper.

The Baby Walker

A midwife holding a baby

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

"My kid's a holy terror... no offense."

Coping with a strong-willed child

'That's not speaking, that's barking Try again'

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet. . . where the hell am I??"

'No, that wasn't your mother calling to ask if you were okay. That was your mother calling to ask if I was okay.'

Janey then realized that babysitting isn't easy...

Mum and the Sleepless Baby

(No caption. Signs on file cabinets drawers read, "Files Saved to Hard Drive," "Files Saved to Disk," "Files Saved to Traveldrive," "Trash.")

"Remember you told me to put my client list on my computer."

Need an elevated state of mind too!

Gardener's Calendar: Try to put the other things back...

New Swiss Army Knife

Crying baby

"We'd love to come, but we can't seem to find a sitter."

Parenting Business Deals

'Before we start, would everyone please put your cell phone in the middle of the table?'

"I find that my strongest passwords are those created when the cat walks across the keyboard."

Happy Tots Day Care.

Dentist Training School.

"Tell the truth, Ezra. Does it look like he's being a more effective parent than me?"

'They've been in there all day writing the job description.'

Quiet Time

"Most projects require three hands."

Paper Trail

"Yes I really do need a glass of water. My duvets on fire."

Dad's home