Telecommunication Aficionados T-Shirts

'Hello, you're through to customer irritation ... how may I help you?'

Campaign for Plain English

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"You've got to learn about verbs. How else are you going to verbalize your feelings?

'Bob, I know you're a Mockingbird, but a few compliments every now and then would greatly help your marriage...'

'Yes, as a matter of fact, you have caught me at a bad time.'

She - Interpreter - He.

'Dial 1-900-Fortune.'

'I'm majoring in communication and minoring in pizza delivery - What about you?'

All of our representatives are busy right now. Stay on the line and someone will be with you in a few miles.

Ruddy bloggers!

'The usual ‘nod, nod, wink, wink' will do, Walter. We don't need the eyebrow twitch and nostril flares.'

"Hi, you've reached Susan's desk. I am monotasking right now, so I'll call you back it's the phone's turn again. Beep!"

"When we first started seeing each other, we would always use the same word for snow."

On-the-job creativity may go unrewarded an may even create consternation among co-workers.

"Stop squawking. Use your words."

They had a tendency to talk past one another.

"Abbreviations here, abbreviations there, and one is more incomprehensible than the next!"

The Love Psychologists

"I'm so glad we don't need a selfie stick."

'Before we get started, let's go around the table and practice making eye contact.'

'I was just ringing to see if you'd got the email about my letter.'

'No, there's nothing on my mind, but if there was I don't want to talk about it.'

Technological advances within the office.

Relationship Issues.

"Go ask your mother ... and I'll tell you why she's wrong."

How to engage an audience

"We don't talk."

'We had seven gloriously happy years together, and then he learned how to talk.'

How it feels to be in a company with poor communication.

'He says he needs his own space.'

"I've never seen a resume that's entirely made up of emojis. Let me take a few moments to decode it."