Teenager Son Pillows

'Explain to us, son, how gaining nine A levels is uncool and damages your street cred.'

'This program is geared towards the youth market. You give it up to five commands and it closes down in a huff!'

'His dad was!'

'You know those chicken wings you love? Somebody had to pluck them.'

"My dad says at some point in your life, fashion isn't important anymore. You basically wear nylon slacks and guayaberas every day."

"No, you can't go to the rock concert! It's vital you don't damage your hearing!"

"I'm grounded. I forgot to delete the car's computer history after we did those crop circles on Earth."

'Teenagers!'

"Yeah, I got into trouble, but I think the principal really enjoyed my rendition of 'I Did It My Way.'"

'Well, Tommy, you've grown a foot since the last time I saw you!'

My Dad, trying to look young. The cap hides his bald spot and the sweatshirt hides his gut!

"Well, young man... just consider yourself grounded!"

"Really? They're now giving out non-participation trophies?"

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

'I'd explain how the TV, VCR, DVD, surround sound home entertainment system works...but I don't know.'

It's a radical new development, a text novel for the text generation

My coach wants me to go to soccer camp. Focusing on one sport isn't good for you. But mom! I'll develop crucial life skills. Let's see. "Landing endorsements, agents and college sports scholarships." The definition of "crucial".

"We’ve nailed guitar-solo-face. Time to try playing instruments."

Mayhem, Inc. Part 21

"Check it out! In nature, females are in charge...they select their mates!"

Grand. Baby Grand. Toddler Grand. Teen Grand.

'The school computers are six months old. How can I be expected to be competitive in the job market if I'm trained on obsolete equipment?'

'Good night, Dear. Text me if you need anything.'

“Dad, I think I’ve finally found Gsus.”

The Life and Times of Miley Cyrus

Wow. Totaled. Teen Test Dummy.

"I'll get up in negative five minutes."

"It's called, 'Goth'."

'You can stick your filthy shell. I'm listening to the Arctic Monkeys.'

"I hate you! You don't understand me and you don't understand my software!"

'This is suppose to be progress.'

'Teens are like trees, you can chart their growth by the number of rings.'

'I'm not doing well in Chemistry - I'm out of my element.'

"I don't need a lecture Dad, I know all I need to know from the online tutorials of @DamKing61, @HotDam72 and @DamEasy27. . ."

'Since we're being so honest, perhaps I should mention that I liked you better as an egg.'