Tee-total Enthusiast Pillows

Alcoholics Antonymous

"Getting the ball in the hole on the first swing is good isn't it?"

Nothing to say! Wouldn't wanna hear about it anyway!

Sober Tooth Tiger

"I'm thinking action roles might not really be your thing."

'Would you like to dance?' Woman has 'No' written on her t-shirt. Guy has 'Why not?'.

'Yes, Mr. Osborne, this is an intervention. Your family had no other choice. Golf is an illness...'

"Finally...it's here! Only the best $20 I've ever spent!"

"Right it's decided! We are both sober for October and Stoptober. Then Movember and Decembeard and Dry January, then..."

"Can I play with your ball, Mister, if you're not using it?"

'Whenever Ralph finds a golf ball he puts it in the basement.'

The Janopause

'You're away, Doc!'

Golf

My Gay Son Never Calls

'Did you see a ball come this way?'

'Fridge magnet' t-shirt.

"I'm having a dry October. . . October 2045."

"Mother, please!"

"It's no fun wearing my Tintin shirt now that the masses know who he is."

'No, I haven't been guzzling tea all day!'

"I'm guessing this is the first time Jack's had a chance to make par?"

Kiss me, I'm swinish.

"Fore!"

'Well, according to this test, your blood group is African blend, two pieces of sugar, no milk.'

Man wearing tee shirt bearing the slogan; 'Enjoy yourself', is being followed by the Grim Reaper, who is wearing a tee shirt bearing the slogan; 'It's later than you think'.

I don't look like much, but I'm going to inherit the earth.

"This Dry January thing is going to be a real challenge."

'See this advert? lost.. one little white ball!'

"That's a lovely tee-shot." - "Well, thank you, it matches my underpants."

'Very profound, sir - let's immortalize it on a t-shirt'

He lived and died for golf.