Techy Doomsayer Pillows

End of world nigh!!!

Online Dating

Free speech isn't cheap!

'Much to his disappointment, Thag's coffee percolator was an invention ahead of its time.

'You see a bunny, I see an off-site system maintained by a 3rd party providing storage, processing power and computer applications.'

'What do you mean that you hacked into Old Faithful's computer so now it's not so faithful?'

The Hard Drive Ate My Homework.

"Kids now program their robots to do their trick-or-treating for them. There's a thin line between ingenuity and laziness."

"I can't understand why you're getting no signal down here? There's plenty of Hotspots!"

Plugged In

"It's a bit of a scam. They sell the crystal ball at cost, then nail you on the price of replacement psych-ink cartridges."

"What do you say we go to the Genius Bar and get a bite to eat?"

'They're finally taking me seriously.'

'I steal from the rich databases and give to the poor databases.'

"OK Zoomer!"

"I derive some satisfaction from being right."

'The End is Near'

"Do I have time to run to the store?"

"I set your phone to alert you every five minutes of what I want for Christmas. It's annoying, but very effective."

'That's odd, that site verified my age by having me type in all my credit card information.'

The world is coming to an end again.

Stop worrying, the end is near anyway!

I know it's been ages since my last confession, but I trust you've been getting my texts?

'Fighting evil, fighting evil, fighting evil...oh, wait, how about the 17th, say noonish?'

"He doesn't talk much. But whatever you do, don't give him your phone number. He will blow up your text."

'If you'd like to read my marriage proposal, check your phone. I texted it to you earlier today. I told you we tech guys were romantic.'

The Boundless Blue Screen of Death

Millenium bug

"I hate these tablets - when I dine out I want a waiter I can snap at!"

The end of the economy is coming!

'...For someone who really cares call your mother.'

The World Will Not End With A Bang Or A Whimper. It Will End With A Hack Or A Tweet.

Where do you see yourself in five years?

'Yup, that sign has been in my family going on five generations.'

A trapeze artist texting forgets to grab his fellow artist.