Tech Trouble Tamer Pillows

"I'll call you back. After 5 hours of confusing explanations and computer jargon, I need to reboot the geek."

Laptop Frustration Fixer

'When the computer senses that you are in a hurry, it automatically slows down.'

"I'm not superstitious, but the internet connection broke down and the computer crashed just when I wanted to buy technology stocks..."

'Please stay on the line -- your call is very important to us... important to us... important to us....'

'Hurry, it's having a nervous breakdown!'

'First our teacher had 'burnout', then the computerized teaching machine 'crashed'.'

'How to beat a computer.'

"For every action, there is an equal and opposite malfunction."

"It's not working. The face ID keeps coming up blank."

'I've gone from spanning the globe at lightening speed to struggling with some techie's accent over a bad connection.'

"A P.C. is a P.C....a Copier is a Copier...and never the twain shall meet!"

"I started an online forum for all of my radiology friends who are sick and tired of all the clicking we have to do logging in and out of programs like EMR and PACS, but so far nobody has logged on..."

"Winslow's computer must be down again."

"I'll help you with your weak Wi-Fi signal. But the next time you call a super hero, make sure it's a real emergency."

Top Tips For Video Interviews

"The only calls not dropped are to your tech support."

"Remember...when the going gets tough...DELEGATE!"

Multi-tasking.

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet. . . where the hell am I??"

"Don’t you eyeball me, Ed! That’s right, look down at the table. Only technicians who remember to back up the data can look at me! And if you start to cry I will fire you!"

"Remember you told me to put my client list on my computer."

". . . so, all I really need to do is change one word."

'Yes sir, I'll get right on it. Would you like it done with or without gusto?'

"Just put that in my, 'I'll get to it when I can, I'm only human' pile."

'Look! It's superwoman...and all her assistants!'

'Welcome aboard, Bob. Your job is to figure out what the hell happened here.'

'Before we start, would everyone please put your cell phone in the middle of the table?'

"I find that my strongest passwords are those created when the cat walks across the keyboard."

"Thanks for the leaf blower! I'm putting it to good use."

Not all service desk staff were pleased about the new bring your own device policy

Overwhelmed by Paperwork

'What do you mean that you hacked into Old Faithful's computer so now it's not so faithful?'

"It seems that your body is adjusting itself to the amount of multitasking you've been doing."

"But you said that to make it start, I had to 'Boot it up'!"