Tech Stock Enthusiast T-Shirts

"They're 'old money'-- they made it all in tech stocks."

"For God sake, Murphy, ALL tech stocks go down once in a while!"

The day the stock market went UP.

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

Late Stage Capitalism and the Biosphere Engage in Some Meaningful Dialogue...

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

In the Guru District

'3 Second Loading Zone.'

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

'There's good news and bad news, J. B. - we now control 51% of this corporation's stock!'

'Our parents were replaced by machines - We'll be replaced with new software.'

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

'Do you remember when our time away from the office was our time...'

"There's smart phones and smart cars, so why can't there be smart rooms that clean themselves?"

Claus 2.0

'Let me through, I'm at Doctor.com.'

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

Girl with smart phone enters door that says "Social Media Studies"

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

'Why can't we have a texting bee?'

It's a male thing - I saw a toaster with power assist, and I bought it.

"He might not have got the job with Google, but they weren't going to stop Brian skateboarding to the office."

"One more time, Mr Claus - who sold you the data?"

Computer Science Class 10101010101.

Investments - remember, you are what you invest in!

'...and in 1/100000 of a second, it can compound the programmer's error 87,500 times.'

'Who changed the password to 'arf'?'

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

"In the old days, we had to constantly feed the screensaver."

'We need to change our luck. Let's move our headquarters to Redmond, the home of Microsoft.'

Will work for ETFs

The Little Search Engine Who Could: 'I think I can...I think I can...'

"Uh-oh...it's starting to delegate work to me."