Tech-savvy Spirituality Gifts

Holy phone

"Does the ark have wifi?"

"I'm going on a retreat."

S�ance "I'm through to your husbands voice-mail"

'I was trying to extinguish my ego, and I got an Out of Memory Error.'

"So no bases are uncovered, Sister Ann gives the sermon to the deaf and Brother Brooks blogs it."

'No, Father, they're not praying. They're texting.'

First O.M.G. church.

'He says he's tried sending you tweets but his cell phones keep melting.'

'Ask about our daily sermon by fax plan.'

'I got one of those new crystal ball smart watches.'

"Joe, is that you? Can you really hear me? What's the password for the email?"

'Guide us, oh Webmaster.'

Cable Bill.

". . . and don't forget to like and subscribe to my channel. Amen."

"The gods must be on-line tonight."

"And the weird shall inherit the Earth, for their ways are difficult for A.I. algorithms to figure out."

You Have 1 New Messages

'Today's sermon may seem a little incoherent -- my 'Preach-o-Mat' program crashed.'

"Please select hymn number 637 on your i-pods."

"You may need to pep up your sermons, sir. Some of the members are requesting WIFI in the pews."

Palm Top Readings

"I have sent you all an e-mail of today's text if you wish to follow along."

Heaven is unattended...leave your prayers at the sound of the tone.

Plugged In

Confession plugged up to an amp.

'If your guru business is slow, do what I did. Get a professional website presence on the Internet. That's how you found me, right?'

"We have a new app that does sin to atonement conversion."

"I can tell much more about you if I read your Palm Pilot."

Binary meditation.

"I'm going on a retreat."

'You didn't hear me say my prayers because I texted them.'

'Well, he's back from tech support.'

"I'm your guardian angel. But due to some technical glitz, I happen not to be invisible!"