Tech-savvy Conversationalist Gifts

'Lately, I have made so many mistakes that I think my life needs a big control-z.'

"Scherer Chevrolet never forgets my birthday."

Dan tells me you're an architect. That is so cool! Thanks! Cloud architect, actually.

Did you hear Playboy's not going to show revealing photos anymore? What's Playboy? House of Java.net Cybercafe. Oh, right. Let me guess: You've never heard of it. Or maybe you have, but you've only read it for the articles. The only thing sadder than you telling those old jokes is if you really don't know ... Is it like Google?

"Is there an emojis that says 'remember when we used to have a cocktail and conversation before dinner?'"

'And you can no longer talk to people face to face!'

'Unaccustomed as I am to public tweeting ... '

'Sure, Bob, now I remember you. I'm bad with names but I never forget a jpeg.'

21st century water cooler conversations.

"Fill out an application? Can't I just text it?"

'Alas, poor Yorick, I knew you well. But dude, you're creeping me out, so I gotta un-friend you!'

e-shoes

"Would you like to keep eighty-seven tabs open?"

Password Error: Snow White and the seven dwarfs not recognised as eight characters.

"I brought back important data on that blue planet called Earth."

It's a radical new development, a text novel for the text generation

Weird things I do because of the internet

'I'd like two pizzas, one with cheese and pepperoni and the other with cheese and sausage. One more thing, do you deliver?'

"Did you get my tweet?"

Your Work/Life Balance Is Off. Shall I Auto-Correct?

Relaxing in the Sun

'...honestly I just feel like we don't communicate like we used to!'

'When I took this job, I had no idea how much it would cut into my quality, family texting time.'

"I was going to have my people call his people, but I’m pretty sure his people have Caller I.D."

"I'm trying to Google what I was thinking about twenty minutes ago!"

"Dad's got a promotion. How can now mute middle management."

'And the best thing about this electric thermal underwear is, no batteries, it's solar!'

'In the computer simulation he said he admired my candor and gave me a raise.'

'Thanks for the book, dad. Now I can reach my computer!'

"Shankar, I needed someone to dot the 'I's' and cross the 'T's' but that was before there was ChatGPT."

Aladdin conjures up a virtual genie.

'And the wicked stepmother looked into her smartphone and said, "Selfie, selfie in my face, who's the fairest in this place?"

Back in my day, we were drawn with ink on paper, not on some fancy digital pad, but at least we knew we existed.

Mr Jones is not seeing anyone in person. Do you have a webcam?

Happiness is spending late summer afternoon on a buying binge at the iPhone app store.