Tech Balance Pillows

"The alarm will alert us when our meditative, present-moment-restoring tech break has ended."

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

"Do you guys serve beer?"

'You'll have to take an online company aptitude test, but if you're the designer we're looking for, you've already designed an app for that.'

"O.K. I'm just feeding in your personal details for a suitable match..."

"My monthly screen time went up from 62 hours to ‘Holy #@!*’."

'He's maturing early.'

"I feel your pain."

Super Strength, Impervious to Bullets And Explosions

Second lifeReal life.

The art of yoga is the power of the mind.

"My mom's restricting my phone. She says I don't have enough Selfie Control."

'Personally I think one great improvement to these tea dances would be some tables.'

"This next one is a typical blues number about exceeding your data plan limit, cracking your ipad screen, and losing your new ear buds."

Gymnasts falling off the winners pedestal.

Binary Man

The whole family can't wrench a teen away from his computer.

Ann suddenly realized that it wasn't her iron that she forgot to turn off, but her cell phone.

'Ok, give me your username & password one more time.'

Haven't Rented a Game in 2 Weeks.

"According to my phone, society is on the brink of collapse, but, according to our living room, things seem pretty O.K."

Please stand by...I have temporarily lost my reason.

'I have the MRI scan of your brain. The right hemisphere is clogged with computer passwords.'

'I hope it's fixed soon. I miss the convenience and friendly beep.'

"Our problem is we upgraded everything in the new version except the hype."

"It's not what you think."

'My app just ate your widget.'

"He used to be a senior fact checker at Meta — now he's just a pedant."

Obsolete: Any piece of machinery that you bought last week for $100,000.

'Oh bugger cramp!'

'For our specials today, we'll despoil our shared environment, filthy-up the air, completely ignore the rules of good global manners and cyber attack all your systems. . .'